


we like to have fun here in south park

by depressed_exe



Category: South Park
Genre: Drama, How Do I Tag, Humor, I'm Sorry, Implied/Referenced Cheating, M/M, Sexual Humor, Texting, This Is STUPID
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-09-17
Updated: 2018-11-01
Packaged: 2019-07-13 15:05:28
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 8,561
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16020404
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/depressed_exe/pseuds/depressed_exe
Summary: [Clyde] craig why are you sitting like that[Craig] i'm gay[Cartman] you look stupid[Craig] so does your crush on kyleCartman left the group.[Clyde] lmaoooo_____Where Clyde makes a group chat and humor and drama mix together.





	1. meme squad v1

**September 17th, 2018; 4:37 pm**

_**Clyde** added **Token, Craig, Tweek,** and **Jimmy** to the group 'we like to have fun here'._

**[Clyde]** hi guys

 **[Token]** why

_**Craig** left the group._

**[Jimmy]** lmao

 **[Clyde]** tf

_**Clyde** added **Craig** to the group._

**[Clyde]** tf you thought

 **[Craig]** fuck you

 **[Clyde]** i don't swing that way

 **[Craig]** sure you do

 **[Token]** guys shut up

 **[Token]** clyde why did you make this

 **[Clyde]** cuz i love you guys

 **[Craig]** no

 **[Clyde]** you're so mean

 **[Craig]** idc

_**Jimmy** sent an attachment._

**[Craig]** wtf

 **[Token]** it's a meme, craig

 **[Craig]** no shit

 **[Clyde]** the tide pod meme is dead

_**Jimmy** sent an attachment._

**[Clyde]** lmaoooo

 **[Token]** then why you laughing at it

 **[Craig]** i hate this

 **[Craig]** tweek wya

 **[Tweek]** home

 **[Clyde]** finally you get on your phone

 **[Tweek]** i been on it

 **[Clyde]** and you just now respond

 **[Tweek]** ya

 **[Clyde]** savage

 **[Craig]** i'm coming over, babe

 **[Tweek]** k

 **[Clyde]** HE SAID 'K'

 **[Clyde]** I'M FUCKING WEAK

 **[Craig]** i'm hurt

 **[Tweek]** sorry, stressful day at work

 **[Jimmy]** go give him a massage craig

 **[Craig]** bet

 **[Clyde]** OOOOOO

 **[Token]** jesus christ

 

**September 19th, 2018; 1:28 pm**

_**Clyde** added **Stan, Kyle, Eric, Kenny,** and **Butters** to the group 'we like to have fun here'._

**[Clyde]** join our hell

 **[Stan]** what

 **[Kenny]** our? sounds like communism propaganda but ok

 **[Clyde]** another meme expert i see

 **[Kenny]** hell yeah bitch

 **[Craig]** omfg

 **[Tweek]** clyde why'd you add them

 **[Kenny]** damn tweek

 **[Kenny]** don't want me here?

 **[Tweek]** nope

 **[Clyde]** LMAOOOO

 **[Craig]** god just shut the fuck up

 **[Kenny]** what crawled up your ass

 **[Clyde]** not tweek's dick that's for sure

 **[Jimmy]** lol

 **[Craig]** fuck off

 **[Kyle]** wtf is this

 **[Stan]** hell if i know

 **[Kenny]** it's a group chat

 **[Kyle]** really? i didn't know

 **[Kenny]** you seriously didn't know?

 **[Kyle]** sarcasm

 **[Kenny]** o

 **[Eric]** kenny you dumbass

 **[Clyde]** shut up who invited you

 **[Eric]** uh?????

 **[Eric]** you did???

 **[Clyde]** oh right

 **[Craig]** can i leave

 **[Clyde]** no

 **[Kenny]** butters answer us

 **[Eric]** dude you're so gay for him

 **[Kenny]** who said

 **[Eric]** your actions

 **[Kenny]** maybe i am, maybe i ain't

 **[Kyle]** ken you're gay for him

 **[Eric]** thanks jew

 **[Kyle]** whatever

 **[Craig]** wait

 **[Craig]** no comeback?

 **[Kyle]** wym

 **[Token]** dude you normally would yell at him for calling you a jew

 **[Token]** but you didn't

 **[Stan]** guys don't worry about it

 **[Craig]** you know something

 **[Stan]** no i don't

 **[Kyle]** just drop it

 **[Kenny]** they gay

 **[Kyle]** KENNY

 **[Clyde]** :O

 **[Craig]** ew

 **[Kyle]** god damnit

 **[Token]** wait it's true????

 **[Kenny]** ya

 **[Eric]** fuck you kenny

 **[Stan]** long sigh

 **[Token]** i'm logging off

 **[Butters]** hey guys what did i miss

 **[Kenny]** lmao don't worry about it buttercup

 **[Butters]** ok ken

 **[Eric]** so gay

 **[Tweek]** dude stfu

 **[Clyde]** tweek wtf

 **[Clyde]** why wait so long to answer

 **[Tweek]** dunno

 **[Craig]** god i love you so much

 **[Tweek]** <3

 **[Eric]** ok bye

 **[Craig]** bye fatass

 

**September 24th, 2018; 1:56 pm**

**[Clyde]** craig why are you sitting like that

 **[Craig]** i'm gay

 **[Cartman]** you look stupid

 **[Craig]** so does your crush on kyle

_**Cartman** left the group._

**[Clyde]** lmaoooo

 **[Craig]** why you texting me in class

 **[Clyde]** bored

 **[Kenny]** hey guys

 **[Craig]** no

 **[Kenny]** why you no love me

 **[Craig]** cuz

 **[Clyde]** you stare at tweek's ass a lot Kenny

 **[Kenny]** i can't help it

 **[Kenny]** it's a really nice ass

 **[Craig]** i'll kick your ass

 **[Kenny]** calm down

 **[Kenny]** butters' ass is wayyyy better

 **[Craig]** are you dumb

 **[Kenny]** wym

 **[Craig]** this is a group chat

 **[Kenny]** so?

 **[Craig]** which butters is a part of

 **[Clyde]** lmao

 **[Kenny]** oh shit

 **[Craig]** dumbass

 

**September 29th, 2018, 2:13 am**

**[Clyde]** hi

 **[Stan]** dude wtf it's 2 in the morning

 **[Clyde]** and you chose to answer anyway

 **[Stan]** fuck you

 **[Clyde]** sorry i'm not gay

 **[Stan]** you are for token tho

 **[Clyde]** shhhhhhhh

 **[Kyle]** guys go to sleep

 **[Clyde]** no u

 **[Kyle]** whatever

 **[Clyde]** hope the bed bugs bite you

 **[Stan]** i'm going back to bed

 **[Clyde]** kk

 

**October 1st, 2018; 12:00 am**

**[Kenny]** time to get spooky

 

**October 1st, 2018; 10:18 am**

**[Kyle]** really kenny?

 **[Kenny]** H A P P Y H A L L O W E E N

 **[Clyde]** GET SPOOPY

 **[Craig]** i hate you

 **[Jimmy]** TRICK OR TREAT MOTHERFUCKERS

 **[Butters]** october just started though

 **[Kenny]** get spooky butters

 **[Kyle]** you're all annoying

 **[Craig]** i agree

 **[Token]** wtf just happened

 **[Kyle]** it's halloween apparently

 **[Tweek]** speaking of

 **[Tweek]** craig i have a question

 **[Craig]** yes honey

 **[Kenny]** that was a fast reply hmm

 **[Tweek]** can we do that couples costume idea we talked about

 **[Craig]** sure babe whatever you want

 **[Clyde]** awwwww i wanna see

 **[Clyde]** send pic of your part of the costume tweek

 **[Tweek]** ok

 **[Craig]** WAIT TWEEK DON'T

 **[Clyde]** why can't he

_**Tweek** sent an attachment._

**[Clyde]** oh

 **[Token]** yooooo what

 **[Kenny]** damn that's hot

 **[Kyle]** WHY IS HE WEARING THAT????

 **[Craig]** BABE I SAID DON'T SEND IT

 **[Kyle]** WHY IS HALF NAKED???

 **[Kyle]** I CAN SEE E V E R Y T H I N G

 **[Kenny]** booty shorts are definitely his thing got damn

 **[Craig]** that wasn't meant for anyone else's eyes

 **[Craig]** and stfu kenny before i kick your ass

 **[Kenny]** i'm saving the pic

 **[Craig]** you better fucking not

 **[Kyle]** WHAT WERE YOU PLANNING ON DOING WITH THAT OUTFIT

 **[Kenny]** they were probably going to fuck with him in it

 **[Stan]** jesus

 **[Tweek]** oops

 **[Craig]** babe wtf

 

**October 17th, 2018; 4:32 pm**

**[Kyle]** what's everyone doing

 **[Clyde]** since when do you start the conversation

 **[Kyle]** since now

 **[Clyde]** but why

 **[Craig]** that's very unusual

 **[Kyle]** so i can't talk to you guys?

 **[Clyde]** but w h y

 **[Stan]** cartman is ignoring him

 **[Craig]** oh now i understand

 **[Kyle]** i don't even know why

 **[Clyde]** are you seriously upset over that

 **[Stan]** he's actually crying. i'm right next to him

 **[Craig]** what

 **[Clyde]** wait why tho

 **[Stan]** uhh

 **[Stan]** they got into an argument, cartman said something out of line, he left and kyle started crying

 **[Clyde]** wait you were there

 **[Stan]** yeah

 **[Craig]** tf did cartman say to make him cry

 **[Stan]** he said "that's why i dont love you" and some other things that i'm not gonna say

 **[Tweek]** i'm gonna kick his ass

 **[Clyde]** tweek you keep popping up out of nowhere

 **[Clyde]** it's freaking me out

 **[Stan]** woah dude

 **[Tweek]** he can't get away with saying something like that

 **[Tweek]** that shit hurts

 **[Stan]** how do you know tho

 **[Tweek]** craig and i had a very similar argument a few years ago

 **[Tweek]** it's hurts in your chest like a motherfucker

 **[Tweek]** fatass needs a beating

 **[Clyde]** you and craig had an argument like that

 **[Craig]** yeah

 **[Clyde]** who said what

 **[Craig]** i said things but it doesn't matter rn

 **[Craig]** focus on kyle

 **[Clyde]** :(

 **[Stan]** yeah i'm talking to cartman later

 **[Tweek]** can i come

 **[Stan]** no tweek

 **[Stan]** he needs to stay alive

 **[Clyde]** oof

 **[Tweek]** ugh ok

 **[Craig]** babe

 **[Tweek]** hmm

 **[Craig]** i'm coming over, i wanna cuddle

 **[Tweek]** ok door's open

 **[Clyde]** so cute

 

**October 28th, 2018; 7:45 pm**

**[Stan]** guys

 **[Clyde]** yo what's up

 **[Stan]** i heard those foreign weirdos are back in south park

 **[Clyde]** you mean gregory and the shovel kid

 **[Stan]** yeah

 **[Clyde]** aren't they gay for each other

 **[Stan]** what

 **[Clyde]** they seemed kinda gay

 **[Craig]** they probably fucking

 **[Clyde]** what's up craig

 **[Craig]** mm

 **[Clyde]** what's wrong

 **[Craig]** nothing

 **[Clyde]** want to talk in private?

 **[Craig]** mhm

 **[Clyde]** ok

 **[Kyle]** what's up with them

 **[Stan]** i dunno

 **[Kyle]** btw that thing you said about gregory and frenchie being gay

 **[Kyle]** it's true

 **[Stan]** oh?

 **[Kyle]** yeah i saw them holding hands and i swear i seen them kiss

 **[Stan]** lol

 **[Kyle]** ya

 **[Kyle]** stan can i talk to you later

 **[Stan]** of course

 

**October 29th, 2018; 3:07 pm**

_**Clyde** added **Eric** to the group 'we like to have fun here'._

**[Clyde]** ok everyone

 **[Clyde]** lot of shit has happened and we need to talk it out together

 **[Craig]** seriously?

 **[Clyde]** yes

 **[Token]** why over text

 **[Clyde]** i don't trust everyone to meet up together

 **[Token]** you're right

 **[Tweek]** what happened

 **[Clyde]** shut up, you're a part of one issue going on

 **[Tweek]** how? what did i do?

 **[Eric]** i don't need to talk about anything

 **[Clyde]** oh yes you do tubby

 **[Eric]** says you

 **[Token]** just shut up and listen

 **[Token]** get this over with clyde

 **[Clyde]** ok first of all

 **[Clyde]** craig told me some shit in private

 **[Craig]** clyde

 **[Clyde]** no shut up

 **[Jimmy]** clyde's pissed

 **[Jimmy]** that's rare

 **[Clyde]** all i'm saying is, craig's jealous

 **[Tweek]** what why

 **[Craig]** oh my god

 **[Tweek]** i'm confused

 **[Clyde]** tweek you've been talking to that one kid with the shovel, what's his name

 **[Tweek]** christophe

 **[Clyde]** yeah and craig is mad about it

 **[Tweek]** why

 **[Craig]** ugh

 **[Tweek]** craig

 **[Craig]** fine. you've been around him a lot lately. you ditch me to hang with him. you smile at him and it's pissing me tf off

 **[Craig]** i just don't wanna lose you to someone else

 **[Tweek]** craig

 **[Tweek]** you have no reason to be jealous

 **[Tweek]** we're only talking about something important, nothing else

 **[Craig]** what do you talk about with him that you can't talk to me about

 **[Tweek]** i can't say

 **[Craig]** seriously wtf

 **[Clyde]** tweek tell him

 **[Tweek]** no

 **[Craig]** then how am I supposed to believe a word you said when you can't tell me what you guys always talk about

 **[Tweek]** craig believe me

 **[Tweek]** i just can't say

 **[Craig]** dude i can't even trust you

 **[Tweek]** 'dude'? what happened to 'babe'?

 **[Craig]** you don't deserve to be called that

_**Tweek** left the group._

**[Craig]** oh fuck

 **[Craig]** god damnit

 **[Clyde]** i can add christophe to this group real quick to have him tell you

 **[Token]** you have his number?

 **[Clyde]** yup

_**Clyde** added **Christophe** to the group._

**[Clyde]** christophe tell us what you and tweek talk about

 **[Christophe]** the fuck

 **[Christophe]** why should i

 **[Clyde]** craig needs to know, that's all i'm saying

 **[Christophe]** he told me not to tell

 **[Craig]** see that's why i can't trust tweek no more

 **[Christophe]** wait fine i'll tell you

 **[Christophe]** he's uh

 **[Christophe]** he's asking me about proposing to craig

 **[Craig]** wait what

 **[Clyde]** ohhh my god

 **[Christophe]** he was gonna ask you to marry him after graduation, he just needed advice on how

 **[Christophe]** i'm leaving now

_**Christophe** left the group._

**[Token]** jesus dude

 **[Jimmy]** i didn't expect that tbh

 **[Clyde]** aww craig

 **[Clyde]** he wants to marry you. how cute

 **[Craig]** can you add him back

_**Clyde** added **Tweek** to the group._

**[Clyde]** tweek

 **[Tweek]** wtf why'd you add me back. i'm not in the mood

 **[Craig]** tweek i say yes

 **[Tweek]** huh?

 **[Craig]** i say yes to marrying you

 **[Clyde]** AWWWW

 **[Tweek]** wait how'd you find out??????

 **[Craig]** christophe

 **[Tweek]** oh

 **[Tweek]** you actually want to marry me

 **[Craig]** yeah, i love you a lot

 **[Tweek]** that makes me so happy

 **[Craig]** <3

 **[Tweek]** we're leaving, we'll talk later

 **[Clyde]** ok now that that's fixed and they're going to fuck

 **[Clyde]** cartman and kyle

 **[Kyle]** we broke up

 **[Clyde]** woah i didn't get to finish

 **[Kyle]** we never made up after that day and i don't want to be with him if he's gonna say that shit

 **[Clyde]** true true

 **[Clyde]** cartman wtf

 **[Eric]** he was being a pansy jew bitch over something stupid so i said what i said

 **[Stan]** how was it over something stupid

 **[Eric]** stay outta this

 **[Stan]** no

 **[Stan]** you said you got drunk the night before and confessed to fucking heidi

 **[Stan]** that is not something stupid

 **[Eric]** so?

 **[Token]** dude is he serious

**[Stan]** you made him cry fuck face 

**[Eric]** not my fault heidi is better than him 

_**Clyde** removed **Eric** from the group._

**[Clyde]** what an ass 

**[Stan]** i'm gonna fucking murder him 

**[Token]** kyle you ok? 

**[Kyle]** uh yeah i'm fine 

**[Stan]** you can come over if you want 

**[Kyle]** ok thank you. omw now 

**[Clyde]** so stan, you and kyle? 

**[Stan]** we're uh 

**[Stan]** we're dating 

**[Clyde]** ooooo since when 

**[Stan]** since i talked to him in private 

**[Stan]** i confessed to him 

**[Clyde]** aww you guys are cute 

**[Kenny]** yeah way cuter than him and cartman 

**[Clyde]** kenny fess up 

**[Kenny]** excuse me wtf 

**[Clyde]** butters is here, say it 

**[Butters]** what about me being here? 

**[Kenny]** uh clyde, i'm not ready 

**[Clyde]** dude you won't get rejected 

**[Kenny]** fine. if i say it, you fess up too 

**[Clyde]** i don't know what you're talking about 

**[Kenny]** yes you do 

**[Jimmy]** i know what's he's talking about 

**[Kenny]** thanks jim 

**[Clyde]** damnit fine 

**[Kenny]** butters 

**[Butters]** lol ken, i like you too 

**[Kenny]** wait how'd you know what i was gonna say 

**[Butters]** i knew you liked me for a while 

**[Butters]** it's obvious 

**[Kenny]** if you knew, then why didn't you say anything 

**[Butters]** i wanted to see if you had the balls to tell me first 

**[Clyde]** OOF 

**[Token]** lmao 

**[Kenny]** damn dude lol 

**[Kenny]** you wanna go to the movies tomorrow then? 

**[Butters]** of course 

**[Kenny]** sweet 

**[Clyde]** FINALLY 

**[Kenny]** ok clyde 

**[Kenny]** your turn 

**[Kyle]** i just got to stan's and i see this 

**[Kyle]** congrats kenny and butters 

**[Kenny]** thanks ky 

**[Butters]** :) 

**[Kyle]** what does clyde have to do 

**[Kenny]** ya know about his little attachment 

**[Kyle]** oh right lol 

**[Jimmy]** come on clyde just say it 

**[Token]** yeah just do what you need to do. i got guitar classes soon 

**[Clyde]** damnit uh 

**[Clyde]** token i like you 

**[Token]** as a friend? 

**[Clyde]** no not as a friend 

**[Token]** oh. i never noticed 

**[Clyde]** yeahh 

**[Token]** i know a restaurant that serves tacos in denver, you wanna go together next week? 

**[Clyde]** *le gasp* 

**[Clyde]** UH YEAH 

**[Jimmy]** lol 

**[Kenny]** see clyde, wasn't so hard 

**[Clyde]** yup i knew i could do it 

**[Kenny]** sure buddy 

****October 31st, 2018, 8:37 pm** **

**[Clyde]** WHAT'S EVERYONE DOING FOR HALLOWEEN??? 

**[Token]** calm down, babe 

**[Jimmy]** pet names already? 

**[Token]** hell yeah 

**[Jimmy]** anyway, i'm just watching netflix 

**[Clyde]** exciting 

**[Clyde]** token and i baked some pumpkin shaped cookies to eat and giving out candy to kids 

**[Jimmy]** you dressed up? 

**[Clyde]** yeah. i'm red riding hood and token is the wolf 

**[Jimmy]** cute 

**[Clyde]** what about everyone else 

**[Stan]** kyle and i are trick or treating with craig and tweek 

**[Clyde]** tweek's ass sticking out? 

**[Stan]** yeah but craig tied a jacket around his waist 

**[Stan]** someone thought it'd be funny to smack his ass. craig got so mad lol 

**[Clyde]** i can see that 

**[Clyde]** what you wearing 

**[Stan]** kyle and i dressed like our favorite anime characters 

**[Clyde]** weebs 

**[Stan]** you know it 

**[Tweek]** hey 

**[Clyde]** tweek keep your ass covered 

**[Tweek]** yeah i know 

**[Clyde]** you wearing a pretty revealing outfit. how's that working out 

**[Tweek]** people keep looking at me 

**[Stan]** it's funny 

**[Stan]** everytime someone looks at tweek, craig grabs his ass and flips the person off 

**[Clyde]** his over protective ass 

**[Jimmy]** pez despenser neck ass 

**[Token]** lmao 

**[Jimmy]** human giraffe looking ass 

**[Clyde]** dude stop i'm weak 

**[Token]** you killed him. he fell on the floor 

**[Craig]** fuck you 

**[Clyde]** LMAOOO 

**[Tweek]** lol 

**[Kenny]** hey guys 

**[Token]** yo 

**[Clyde]** wyd 

**[Kenny]** butters and i took karen to her school's halloween party 

**[Clyde]** ooo 

**[Kenny]** butters is so nice to her. i love him so much 

**[Kenny]** i wonder if he'll ever want kids 

**[Stan]** ken slow down 

**[Kenny]** right sorry 

**[Kenny]** he's dancing with her rn 

**[Clyde]** aww 

**[Clyde]** stan where's kyle. he hasn't responded 

**[Stan]** we took a break. we're all at tweek bros 

**[Stan]** he fell asleep 

**[Clyde]** hey stay there, token and i are coming 

**[Kenny]** yeah butters and i will be there too 

**[Jimmy]** omw tho 

**[Stan]** damn ok 

**[Clyde]** squad boutta pull up

 **[Kenny]** hell yeah boi

 **[Craig]** dumbasses


	2. meme squad v2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> [Stan] ken
> 
> [Stan] if i had a dollar
> 
> [Stan] for everytime i seen you eye fuck butters
> 
> [Kenny] hold up
> 
> [Stan] i'd have $6
> 
> [Kenny] fuck off

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I decided to write another chapter just because I loved writing the first one.

**November 5th, 2018; 5:21 pm**

**[Kenny]** yo

 **[Stan]** wassup

 **[Clyde]** you owned a car for four years

 **[Stan]** ?

 **[Clyde]** you named him brad

 **[Kenny]** you l o v e d brad

 **[Clyde]** and then you totaled him

 **[Kenny]** you two have been through everything together

 **[Clyde]** two boyfriends three jobs

 **[Kenny]** you're like nothing can replace b r a d

 **[Clyde]** then liberty mutual calls

 **[Kenny]** and you break into your happy dance

 **[Stan]** wtf

 **[Clyde]** lmao

 **[Craig]** you guys are retarded

 **[Kenny]** thanks

 

**November 8th, 2018; 10:45 pm**

**[Clyde]** i said i like it like that

 **[Kenny]** you gotta believe me when i tell you

 **[Clyde]** i said i like it that

 **[Kenny]** now i like diamonds, i like dollars

 **[Token]** what

 **[Kyle]** isn't that a cardi b song?

 **[Token]** yup

 **[Tweek]** i hate cardi b

 **[Clyde]** bitch tf

 **[Tweek]** she stole nicki minaj's style dude

 **[Clyde]** fuck outta here

 **[Tweek]** screw you

 **[Kyle]** i agree with tweek tho

 **[Kyle]** i don't care if she had a cute ass baby, her music sucks

 **[Tweek]** THANK YOU

 **[Clyde]** oof whatever

 **[Kenny]** she's not THAT bad

 **[Token]** meh i don't have an opinion on her

 **[Clyde]** babe we're listening to her music. come over

 **[Token]** fine

 **[Kyle]** don't tell me craig likes her music

 **[Tweek]** he literally only listens to 80s music

 **[Tweek]** and bruno mars every once in a while

 **[Kyle]** good

 

**November 17th, 2018; 1:43 pm**

**[Token]** hey

 **[Token]** thanksgiving is coming up

 **[Token]** do you all want to come over to my house for dinner

 **[Clyde]** HELL YES

 **[Clyde]** WE BOUTTA SMASH ON SUM TURKEY

 **[Craig]** can't

 **[Craig]** richard wants to take me and tweek coffee testing for our wedding

 **[Clyde]** richard? you call tweek's dad by his first name?

 **[Craig]** sum wrong with that?

 **[Clyde]** yeah

 **[Clyde]** call him dad

 **[Craig]** uh not yet

 **[Token]** i can tell you're flustered craig

 **[Craig]** shut up

 **[Token]** ok so #creek isn't coming

 **[Clyde]** lol

 **[Token]** anyone else?

 **[Token]** wait. coffee testing? that's a thing?

 **[Craig]** i guess

 **[Clyde]** weird

 **[Kyle]** i'll ask my mom

 **[Clyde]** dude you're 18

 **[Clyde]** right?

 **[Kyle]** not yet

 **[Kyle]** birthday's in may

 **[Clyde]** oh right

 **[Stan]** yeah i'll go if kyle dies

 **[Stan]** *DOES

 **[Clyde]** lmao

 **[Kyle]** damn ok

 **[Stan]** it was a typo

 **[Jimmy]** dunno if i can yet. i'll let you know

 **[Token]** ok

 **[Butters]** i'm coming

 **[Butters]** i'll bring some pumpkin cupcakes

 **[Token]** sweet thanks

 **[Kenny]** I LOVE THOSE CUPCAKES BABE

 **[Butters]** lol i know

 **[Kenny]** <3

 **[Clyde]** cartman's not invited right?

 **[Kyle]** better fucking not

 **[Stan]** like i said before, i'll murder him

 **[Clyde]** alright then that's a no

 **[Token]** alright see you all then

 

**November 30th, 2018; 11:23 am**

**[Kenny]** it's christmas

 **[Kyle]** THANKSGIVING JUST ENDED

 **[Kenny]** merry christmas i guess

 **[Kyle]** um

 **[Kenny]** sorry

 **[Kenny]** happy hanukkah

 **[Kyle]** mm

 **[Kenny]** doesn't stan celebrate christmas tho

 **[Kyle]** ya

 **[Kyle]** we decided to go every other year so we celebrate both

 **[Kenny]** ooh that's a good idea

 **[Kyle]** yeah

 **[Kyle]** we got christmas this year

 **[Clyde]** SHOVE A CANDY CANE UP MY ASS AND CALL ME SANTA MERRY CHRISTMAS

 **[Kyle]** tf

 **[Kenny]** hell yeah

 **[Craig]** yo wtf clyde

 **[Clyde]** HO HO HO

 **[Craig]** you are a hoe

 **[Stan]** hey kyle i'm putting the tree up at my house. wanna help?

 **[Kyle]** yeah. omw

 **[Craig]** kenny wya

 **[Kenny]** why tf you asking

 **[Craig]** just fucking tell me

 **[Kenny]** at butters' house

 **[Craig]** figured

 **[Craig]** tweek needs to talk to butters

 **[Craig]** needs another person's opinion on cake frosting

 **[Kenny]** ok i'll let him know

 **[Kenny]** you at tweek's?

 **[Craig]** no. mine

 **[Kenny]** he's on his way

 **[Clyde]** i wanna test frosting

 **[Craig]** no. you'll eat it all

 **[Kenny]** he's right you know

 **[Clyde]** screw you

 

**December 4th, 2018; 6:47 pm**

**[Stan]** ken

 **[Stan]** if i had a dollar

 **[Stan]** for everytime i seen you eye fuck butters

 **[Kenny]** hold up

 **[Stan]** i'd have $6

 **[Kenny]** fuck off

 **[Stan]** butters

 **[Stan]** kenny wants to fuck you

 **[Butters]** i sure hope so

 **[Butters]** we're dating

 **[Stan]** go suck his dick

 **[Butters]** only if he wants me to

 **[Kenny]** wait wait wait

 **[Stan]** are you serious

 **[Butters]** yeah

 **[Kenny]** shit

 **[Clyde]** butters you hoe

 **[Kenny]** don't call him that

 **[Clyde]** issa joke

 **[Kenny]** just watch it

 **[Kenny]** butters meet me in the bathroom

 **[Stan]** lmao

 

**December 5th, 2018; 4:56 pm**

**[Clyde]** ok guys

 **[Clyde]** answer this truthfully

 **[Clyde]** if you could fuck any girl in our class

 **[Clyde]** who would it be

 **[Craig]** i'm gay

 **[Tweek]** i choose craig

 **[Clyde]** he's not a girl

 **[Tweek]** i said

 **[Tweek]** i. choose. craig.

 **[Clyde]** OK DAMN

 **[Craig]** i'm gay

 **[Kenny]** lol

 **[Clyde]** fine

 **[Clyde]** then pick any guy

 **[Clyde]** BESIDES TWEEK

 **[Craig]** no

 **[Craig]** tweek keeps glaring at me

 **[Jimmy]** lol

 **[Clyde]** idc. you gotta answer

 **[Token]** i pick tweek tbh

 **[Craig]** WOAH THERE

 **[Clyde]** oh?

 **[Kenny]** lmao

 **[Tweek]** :/

 **[Clyde]** well i kinda do to

 **[Jimmy]** haha damn guys

 **[Jimmy]** i guess we all do

 **[Tweek]** what

 **[Craig]** NONE OF Y'ALL ARE TO BE AROUND TWEEK ANYMORE

 **[Clyde]** LMFAO

 **[Clyde]** craig answer

 **[Craig]** no

 **[Kenny]** clyde i'd fuck you

 **[Clyde]** bruh

 **[Clyde]** at least HE answered

 **[Butters]** i think craig's pretty hot

 **[Craig]** damn right i am

 **[Tweek]** rip butters stotch

 **[Clyde]** TWEEK YOU SAVAGE

 **[Kyle]** i pick token

 **[Clyde]** you like chocolate?

 **[Kyle]** you do too bitch

 **[Clyde]** true

 **[Token]** jesus dude

 **[Stan]** i guess i gotta answer

 **[Stan]** i'm going with tweek

 **[Craig]** I SAID NO

 **[Clyde]** craig you gotta answer

 **[Craig]** fine

 **[Craig]** butters

 **[Clyde]** bro

 **[Clyde]** it's mutual oh my god

 **[Clyde]** why tho

 **[Craig]** he's cute i guess

 **[Butters]** thanks buddy

 **[Craig]** tweek please stop staring at me

 **[Kenny]** LMAO

 **[Clyde]** wait tweek

 **[Clyde]** give us a proper answer

 **[Tweek]** damien

 **[Clyde]** ooo you like them evil bitches

 **[Craig]** can we stop now

 **[Clyde]** you're no fun

 

**December 13th, 2018; 10:04 am**

_**Kenny** sent an attachment._

_**Kenny** sent an attachment._

_**Kenny** sent an attachment._

_**Kenny** sent an attachment._

**[Kyle]** STOP IT

 **[Kenny]** what do you mean

 **[Kyle]** quit sending memes

 **[Stan]** yeah please. i'm tired of hearing our phones go off every 30 seconds

 **[Kenny]** am i cockblocking you

 **[Stan]** YES YOU ARE

 **[Kenny]** oh i didn't think you'd answer that truthfully

 **[Kyle]** kenny

 **[Kenny]** dick him down good stan

 **[Stan]** that's the plan

 **[Kyle]** STAN

 

**December 19th, 2018; 4:21 am**

**[Kenny]** ,,,,,,,i,m dir t y dn a

 **[Stan]** are you ok?

 **[Kenny]** no

 **[Kyle]** what's that say?

 **[Stan]** i'm dirty Dan

 **[Clyde]** WHO YOU CALLING PIN HEAD

 **[Kyle]** oh my god

 **[Clyde]** what you all doing up at this time

 **[Kenny]** i'm here cuz insomnia

 **[Stan]** same

 **[Clyde]** wack

 **[Kenny]** wackin it

 **[Clyde]** i m d i r t y d a n

 **[Stan]** don't make me laugh my walls are thin

 **[Clyde]** TOO BAD BECAUSE THESE WALLS ARE T H I C K

 **[Stan]** stop making me laugh i fucknig hat eyou

 **[Clyde]** t h i c c

 **[Kyle]** GO BACK TO SLEEP

 

**December 21th, 2018; 9:23 am**

**[Stan]** wikihow to die instantly

 **[Kenny]** me too

 **[Craig]** i'll kill you instantly

 **[Kenny]** butters will protect me

 **[Craig]** i'll kill him too

 **[Kenny]** i thought you said he was cute and you'd fuck him

 **[Craig]** LET IT DIE

 

**December 22nd, 2018; 7:58 pm**

**[Clyde]** guys i lost my phone

 **[Craig]** retard

 **[Tweek]** uh clyde

 **[Tweek]** you're on it

 **[Clyde]** OH SHIT I FOUND IT

 **[Clyde]** THANKS TWEEK YOU'RE A GENIUS

 **[Tweek]** you're welcome?

 **[Craig]** fucking idiot

 

**December 28th, 2018; 1:29 pm**

**[Kenny]** we deadass just not talked on christmas

 **[Stan]** yuuup

 **[Kenny]** wack

 **[Kenny]** it sucked anyway

 **[Stan]** how?

 **[Kenny]** i couldn't see butters all day. his parents hate me

 **[Stan]** that sucks

 **[Kenny]** you good bruh?

 **[Stan]** not feeling good. stomach ache

 **[Kenny]** oh

 **[Butters]** kenny i'm sorry we couldn't see each other on christmas. my parents would've grounded me if i left

 **[Kenny]** you're 18 and your parents still tell you what to do

 **[Butters]** i live in their house, i have to

 **[Kenny]** as soon as i turn 18, i'm getting you and we're leaving

 **[Butters]** that sounds amazing

 **[Kenny]** then we're doing that

 **[Stan]** y'all just gonna leave me and kyle here

 **[Kenny]** yup

 **[Stan]** damn

 

**December 29th, 2018; 3:12 pm**

**[Clyde]** ALL YOU LADIES POP YO PUSSY LIKE DIS

 **[Clyde]** SHAKE YOUR BODY DON'T STOP DON'T MISS

 **[Tweek]** ????

 **[Jimmy]** MY NECK MY BACK LICK MY PUSSY AND MY CRACK

 **[Tweek]** i hate that song

 **[Clyde]** cuz it's about pussy and you hate pussy

 **[Tweek]** i guess idk

 **[Clyde]** if it was about dick it'd probably be your fav song

 **[Tweek]** perhaps

 **[Craig]** wtf did i just read

 **[Clyde]** tweek likes pussy now

 **[Tweek]** NO I DON'T THAT'S NOT WHAT I SAID

 **[Clyde]** i'm playing

 **[Clyde]** you be sucking craig off all day so i know you hate pussy

 **[Tweek]** bitch stfu

 **[Craig]** yeah he suck dick good

 **[Tweek]** CRAIG

 **[Craig]** what? you do

 **[Clyde]** we didn't need to know that tho

 **[Craig]** idc

 

**December 31st, 2018; 11:43 pm**

**[Kyle]** new year new me

 **[Craig]** probably not

 **[Kyle]** i'll suck dick better in the new year

 **[Craig]** me too

 **[Token]** chill

 **[Craig]** you know you will too token

 **[Token]** shut up

 **[Clyde]** HAPPY NEW YEAR BITCHES

 **[Kyle]** not yet hoe

 **[Craig]** lol

 **[Kyle]** craig you seem happy

 **[Craig]** yeah what of it

 **[Kyle]** nun just noticing things

 **[Clyde]** who y'all kissing when the ball drop

 **[Craig]** isn't it obvious who we're kissing

 **[Clyde]** true

 **[Clyde]** jimmy wbu

 **[Jimmy]** i'm kissing my goku body pillow

 **[Kyle]** but naruto

 **[Jimmy]** if you say naruto is better than dbz then we need to fight bro

 **[Kyle]** i'll kick your crippled ass

 **[Jimmy]** you can kiss my crippled ass

 **[Clyde]** oof

 **[Craig]** i'm leaving. tweek wants to cuddle before the ball drops

 **[Clyde]** "cuddle"

 **[Clyde]** they gon fuck into 2019

 **[Craig]** problem?

 **[Clyde]** nope. you do you

 **[Clyde]** or in this case, you do tweek

 **[Tweek]** who said he's topping

 **[Kyle]** LMFAO

 **[Jimmy]** god damn bruh

 **[Craig]** ok bye

 **[Clyde]** CRAIG GETTING DICKED DOWN MY DUDES

 **[Kyle]** i knew he was a bottom

 **[Clyde]** you're a bottom

 **[Kyle]** no i'm not

 **[Stan]** he's not

 **[Clyde]** OH

 **[Clyde]** i'm logging off


	3. meme squad v3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> [Clyde] i just heard sperm has nutrients in it
> 
> [Kyle] yeah i think it does
> 
> [Clyde] really?!
> 
> [Clyde] token come here a sec
> 
> [Token] stop
> 
> [Tweek] clyde stop being a thot

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> WARNING: Mentions of cheating and shit like that.
> 
> There's a lot of Craig/Butters in this chapter and probably for the next if I do another one. It's my OTP crack ship so I had to. Sorry to creek and bunny shippers (I love them too but I needed to make this story more dramatic).

Monday; 11:29 pm

[Clyde] hey jimmy

[Jimmy] what

[Clyde] you got the good shit?

[Jimmy] yeah,,,,,keep it on the down low tho

[Clyde] i'll venmo u

Jimmy sent an image.

[Clyde] oh hell yeah the good good

[Jimmy] get me the money now

[Clyde] done

[Jimmy] good. now lets get going

[Clyde] agreed. same place next week?

[Jimmy] same place

[Clyde] cya

[Jimmy] later

[Tweek] did i just witness a fucking drug deal???

 

Monday; 3:01 pm

[Stan] kms

[Token] what did you do

[Stan] breathed

[Token] i'm concerned

[Stan] why tho

[Token] is that just humor or a cry for help?

[Stan] a bit of both

[Token] that's even more concerning

[Kyle] all he did was snap a game disc in half

[Stan] IT WAS A NEW GAME

[Stan] IT COST $60 BABE

[Token] how'd you even brake it

[Kyle] he tried taking the disc out of the case and bent it too much

[Token] damn

[Stan] I'M CRYING RN

[Kyle] calm down

[Stan] UGH

[Kyle] i'll fuck you good and then i'll buy you another one

[Token] does that actually work?

[Token] hello?

[Token] I NEED TO KNOW IMMEDIATELY

[Token] damnit

 

Tuesday; 5:43 am

[Butters] hey fellas

[Craig] it's almost 6 in the morning

[Craig] why are you up

[Butters] ken was over here to stay the night

[Butters] we fell asleep a couple hours ago

[Butters] i just woke up and he's not here

[Butters] he won't answer his phone so i thought i'd hop in the gc

[Craig] oh

[Craig] i'll call him for you

[Butters] oh you don't have to

[Butters] i think his phone is off anyway

[Craig] then i'll go look for him

[Butters] please don't do that

[Butters] he's my boyfriend, i'll go look

[Craig] it's almost below 0 outside, you'll freeze to death

[Craig] stay in bed, i'm going to look

[Butters] oh ok

[Butters] thanks buddy

[Craig] it's fine just stay home

 

Tuesday; 7:02 am

[Kenny] hey buttercup

[Kenny] sorry i didn't answer right away

[Kenny] my phone was dead

[Butters] oh it's ok

[Craig] wtf kenny

[Craig] and no that's not ok, that's fucked

[Craig] where'd you even go??

[Kenny] i went on a walk and stopped at stark's pond

[Kenny] i realized my phone was dead so I stopped at my house to charge it

[Craig] you should've told butters you were leaving

[Craig] he was worried so i'm out here looking for you

[Kenny] you didn't need to

[Craig] i felt like it asshole

[Butters] wait

[Butters] are you still outside???

[Craig] yeah

[Butters] go home! you'll get sick!

[Craig] already ahead of you

[Kenny] i'm sorry for worrying you buttercup

[Butters] it's fine

[Butters] i love you ken

[Kenny] i love you too

 

Tuesday; 10:27 am

[Clyde] i just heard sperm has nutrients in it

[Kyle] yeah i think it does

[Clyde] really?!

[Clyde] token come here a sec

[Token] stop

[Tweek] clyde stop being a thot

[Clyde] sjoljaukllgds

[Clyde] ew that key smash was ugly, let me try again

[Clyde] asdfghjkl

[Clyde] slightly better

[Token] long sigh

[Tweek] you guys know where craig is?

[Token] hold up

[Clyde] why you asking us? don't you guys usually get together realllll early?

[Tweek] yeah but he's not answering his phone like he usually does at this time

[Token] you at work?

[Tweek] yeah

[Token] i'll go to his house and check there

[Tweek] kk

[Clyde] he's probably sleeping

[Tweek] he's always up at this time to feed stripe #6

[Clyde] then idk

[Kyle] good morning guys

[Clyde] morning kike

[Clyde] *KYLE

[Clyde] fuck i almost died

[Kyle] dick head

[Clyde] STEP TF UP KYLE

[Kyle] stop

[Clyde] hhhhhhhhhhh

[Tweek] wtf

[Clyde] srry my phone glitched

[Tweek] nah that was sum demon type shit

[Clyde] yeah what of it

[Tweek] you're a demon

[Clyde] so?

[Tweek] get therapy

[Clyde] hhhhhhhhhhh HH

[Kyle] omg

[Kyle] i'm going job hunting bye

[Clyde] lmao

[Tweek] i'm too anxious for this

[Clyde] haha yeah

[Token] btw craig's just sleeping

[Tweek] jeez and i was worried for nothing

[Token] should i let him sleep?

[Tweek] yeah

[Token] ok

[Token] clyde i'm coming over

[Token] we're gonna go look for apartments

[Clyde] hhhhhhh hhhhHHHhh HHhhhhhh

[Token] ok

 

Tuesday; 8:06 pm

[Kenny] binches

[Kyle] kenny we're all in the same room

[Kenny] i hate talking outloud

[Kenny] let's just text

[Stan] it's game night, get off your phone

[Clyde] i like texting tho

[Stan] GAME NIGHT HOE

[Clyde] pls

[Stan] fine

[Stan] wait what?

[Stan] where the fuck did craig go?

[Craig] away

[Stan] you were just here a second ago…

[Craig] and now im gone

[Stan] how did you leave so quickly?

[Craig] i'm gay

[Kyle] what is happening?

[Stan] he just... disappeared

[Kyle] that can't be right

[Butters] where do you think he went

[Craig] i'm not at the living room if that's what you're asking

[Stan] i didn't see you leave??

[Craig] ya

[Craig] i know

[Token] are you a fucking cryptid

[Craig] you bet bitch

[Stan] he's back…

[Craig] ya

[Stan] he didn't walk through the door????

[Craig] ya

[Stan] y'know what i'm gonna take a break, i need to process what just happened

[Butters] i'm confused

[Kenny] i think i’m dead

[Kyle] i'm going to just... go back to the game…

[Token] craig don't fucking walk around like you didn't just pull some cryptid shit

[Craig] what are you taking about

[Tweek] stop fuckin wi th my head

[Stan] you just... disappeared?

[Craig] i never? left? the room?? i'm still here????

[Token] read the old messages?

[Craig] what about it?

[Token] we were discussing you leaving?

[Craig] the last message sent here was stan saying fine

[Tweek] STOP IT MY BRAIN IS FRzzLED

[Craig] are y'all okay

[Tweek] N O

[Token] he just pulled some bullshit right there what the fuck

[Stan] i'm going for a walk

 

Wednesday; 11:22 am

[Craig] I SAID NO! YOU CAN'T LET MY BOYFRIEND FUCK YOU!

[Craig] oh shit wrong chat

[Craig] my bad

[Kyle] wtf

[Jimmy] who were you even talking to

[Craig] some girl

[Kyle] they want tweek to fuck them?

[Craig] YES JFC

[Kyle] chill, i was just asking

[Jimmy] what girl?

[Craig] no one

[Jimmy] no bitch tell me

[Craig] fuck off

[Kenny] tell me then

[Craig] i'm still mad at you hoe

[Kenny] damnit

[Kyle] craig who is it?

[Craig] i'm not telling you either tf

[Butters] what's going on

[Craig] stupid shit

[Craig] apparently my COUSIN red wants to fuck my boyfriend

[Jimmy] tf I thought you weren't gonna tell us

[Jimmy] fucking wack

[Craig] anyway

[Craig] i told her off in the wrong chat so if you'll excuse me

[Kenny] tragic

[Kyle] red's a hoe anyway

[Kyle] she tried feeling stan up in the hallway before 2nd period

[Kyle] i ended up punching her but got away with it cuz i'm gay

[Jimmy] she's almost a big a hoe as bebe

[Jimmy] probs more

[Butters] ken can you come over for a little?

[Kenny] can't

[Kenny] mom's making me go buy some food

[Butters] aw ok

[Kenny] srry maybe tomorrow

[Butters] ok

 

Wednesday; 5:37 pm

[Craig] butters

[Butters] hm?

[Craig] i read the chat from earlier

[Craig] kenny ditched you again?

[Butters] yeah

[Craig] fucking asshole

[Butters] i'm used to it

[Craig] you shouldn't be

[Craig] you're dating

[Butters] yeah...

[Craig] well i know how you feel

[Butters] huh?

[Craig] tweek ditched me the last couple of days

[Craig] said he was working

[Craig] he was yesterday but I didn't see him there today

[Craig] oh well i guess

[Butters] i'm sorry buddy

[Craig] meh

[Butters] it's weird tho

[Butters] he's never ditched you before

[Craig] i know, that's why i'm pretty pissed

[Stan] dudes

[Stan] kenny lied to you butters

[Butters] what?

[Stan] and tweek's with Kenny

[Craig] WHAT?

[Craig] HOW DO YOU KNOW?

[Stan] just now saw them at speedway

[Butters] oh

[Craig] what the fuck are they doing???

[Stan] they're getting slushes and a bunch of candy

[Craig] follow them

[Stan] aw what

[Stan] i just want gas bro

[Craig] fucking fine

[Craig] forget it

[Stan] i just wanted to tell you

[Craig] whatever

[Stan] butters i wouldn't stay with kenny if i were you

[Stan] he's lying way too much

[Craig] he's a fucking asshole to butters anyway

[Stan] i know

[Butters] i guess I should break it off then

[Stan] it's probably best to do that

[Butters] yeah...

[Craig] you'll be fine

[Butters] yeah

 

Thursday; 1:21 pm

[Stan] CRAIG

[Craig] what

[Stan] WHAT DID TWEEK DO TO KENNY

[Craig] wym

[Stan] KENNY FUCKING WALKS IN ON ME BALLS DEEP IN KYLE AND I SEE A FUCKNIG HICKEY ON HIS NECK

[Craig] ...

[Craig] huh?

[Stan] kenny

[Stan] has

[Stan] a

[Stan] hickey

[Craig] i need to go

[Stan] craig?

[Stan] CRAIG

[Clyde] what just happened?

[Stan] read last night's chat

[Kyle] i don't think craig's ok

[Kyle] wait

[Kyle] does butters know?

[Stan] i don't know

[Clyde] OH MY GOD

[Clyde] i need to go find craig

[Clyde] you guys go and talk to butters

[Stan] on it

 

Thursday; 6:09 pm

[Clyde] i think this gc was a mistake

[Jimmy] why you say that?

[Clyde] it just started a bunch of problems

[Token] woah

[Token] problems?

[Clyde] ok so

[Clyde] long story short

[Clyde] kenny and tweek cheated on butters and craig with each other

[Token] did i read that right?

[Clyde] yes

[Jimmy] jesus fuck dude

[Token] how are butters and craig doing

[Clyde] they're with me, stan, and kyle rn

[Token] and?

[Clyde] butters seemed to expect it so he's not THAT upset. he cried for a while but now he's just playing a board game with kyle on the floor

[Clyde] craig stopped crying a bit ago. he's laying next to butters and kyle watching their game

[Token] so it's ok right now?

[Clyde] yeah for now

[Clyde] i'm confused tho

[Jimmy] wym

[Clyde] craig keeps glancing at butters for a few seconds then looking away

[Jimmy] weird

[Token] not even gonna say it

[Clyde] say what?

[Token] like i said, not gonna say it

[Jimmy] i think i know

[Clyde] whatever i'm tired

[Token] go home and nap

[Clyde] go idea

[Clyde] come nap with me?

[Token] gimme a sec and i'll be on my way

[Clyde] ok <3

[Token] <3

 

Friday; 9:55 am

[Butters] morning

[Token] hey butters

[Craig] sup

[Butters] still tired

[Craig] sleep more then

[Butters] bed's too empty

[Token] please don't make me sad this early

[Butters] lol sorry

[Craig] i can uh

[Craig] come keep you company

[Butters] you don't have to

[Craig] i want to

[Butters] ok then

[Butters] come over then

[Craig] omw

[Token] how you gon leave me alone

[Butters] lol

[Kyle] i'm up niggas

[Stan] KYLE

[Token] why

[Stan] jesus babe

[Kyle] sorry

[Token] wow

[Kyle] lol

[Butters] you guys are cheering me up a bit

[Kyle] that's good

[Stan] i'm going back to sleep

[Token] same

 

Friday; 2:30 pm

[Token] so what's going on with you know who?

[Clyde] who?

[Kyle] kenny and tweek retard

[Clyde] oohhh

[Clyde] craig broke kenny's phone so he won't be on for a while

[Clyde] tweek's MIA currently so you won't hear from him for a while either

[Token] that's good for now

[Token] what about craig and butters? they ok?

[Kyle] stan and i are with them now

[Kyle] we decided to go to stark's pond with them

[Kyle] they seem really happy

[Kyle] they're just playing in the fucking snow like little kids

[Token] that's...

[Token] alright then

[Kyle] they're making each other laugh and smile so that's all i care about

[Clyde] i think they like each other

[Kyle] no shit

[Clyde] oh

[Token] duh

[Kyle] i don't care as long as they don't fucking start dating in two days, it's wayyyy too early

[Token] true

[Token] well you guys have fun

[Token] clyde you ready for our date?

[Clyde] yup

[Token] alright i'm coming to get you

[Clyde] kk <3

[Token] <3


	4. meme squad v4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> [Butters] suck his dick, pretend you swallowed, go in for a kiss then drop his kids in his mouth
> 
> [Tweek] WHAT
> 
> [Stan] binch wtf
> 
> [Butters] oh shoot
> 
> [Butters] wrong chat
> 
> [Tweek] no let's talk

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I seen that some of you didn't really like the crack ship I added, so I decided to fix it and put creek and bunny back into the story. I just thought that crutters needed a little more recognition but most of you like creek and bunny.
> 
> Anyway, enjoy!

Monday; 11:59 am

[Clyde] i'm worried about pewdiepie

[Kyle] not that guy again

[Clyde] he's amazing fight me

[Stan] MEME REVIEW

[Clyde] THANK YOU

[Craig] why you worried about him

[Clyde] t series is gonna beat him

[Stan] i'm angery

[Kyle] who cares

[Stan] I DO BABE

[Clyde] this is so sad, can we subscribe to pewdiepie

[Craig] tweek watched him all the time

[Clyde] oh

[Stan] let's delete youtube

[Kyle] they tried that once already

[Kyle] it was down for like an hour

[Stan] yeah i 'member that

[Kyle] stop

[Craig] he made tweek laugh when he was feeling down

[Clyde] ...

[Stan] i'm gonna go watch his vids now bye

[Kyle] ugh

 

Monday; 3:15 pm

**Kyle added Gregory to the group.**

[Kyle] gregory told me to add him

[Kyle] he had something to say to craig and butters

[Clyde] k

[Craig] what

[Gregory] hello

[Gregory] i heard about what happened with tweek and kenny

[Craig] god damnit

[Butters] oh hamburgers

[Gregory] i wanted to say that it's not true

[Gregory] they didn't cheat

[Craig] dude

[Craig] kenny had a hickey on his neck

[Craig] and they hung out alone

[Gregory] incorrect

[Craig] ?

[Gregory] as you guys know

[Gregory] tweek and kenny are in the drama club

[Gregory] as am i

[Craig] so?

[Gregory] i was with them

[Gregory] we were practiceing our lines for a play

[Gregory] we were grouped together

[Craig] that doesn't explain the hickey

[Gregory] it's not a hickey

[Gregory] tweek was making cupcakes for a snack

[Gregory] kenny thought it would be funny to surprise him by jabbing his sides

[Gregory] it scared tweek and he punched kenny in the throat

[Gregory] he passed out so we took him to the hospital

[Gregory] it's just a bruise

[Butters] really?

[Gregory] i'm not lying

[Craig] why tf didn't they explain that to us

[Gregory] they said you wouldn't let them

[Craig] oh

[Butters] oh no

[Gregory] kenny said he killed himself but he's still alive so i don't know what he's talking about

[Butters] ...

[Gregory] tweek's as jittery as before

[Gregory] he quit the drama club

[Craig] fuck

[Craig] where is he

[Gregory] probably at his house

[Craig] i'm gonna go talk to him

[Gregory] good idea

[Butters] i gotta find kenny

[Kyle] woah dude

[Kyle] good luck you two

[Clyde] damn bro

 

Tuesday; 12:09 am

[Jimmy] this song is dedicated to a certain kind of people

[Token] ?

[Jimmy] which just so happens to be my other favorite kind of people

[Token] dude what

[Jimmy] ya know the ones that like to ya know hurt themselves bro

[Jimmy] skateboard ollie bro

[Jimmy] kick flip split your lip bro

[Jimmy] kick me in the nuts bro

[Jimmy] ya know what i'm saying right

[Clyde] WHITE PEOPLE

[Clyde] I GET BULLIED AT SCHOOL

[Clyde] I CAN'T WAIT TILL I'M A COP SO I CAN BULLY YOU

[Token] wtf

[Stan] THE WHITE PEOPLE SONG

[Jimmy] YES

[Craig] y'all need help

[Clyde] hhhhHh hhhhHh

[Stan] GET A NEW PHONE

[Clyde] hhhhhhHhhhhh

[Stan] whatever

[Craig] btw tweek and i talked

[Craig] the bruise thing made a lot of sense

[Craig] we decided to start dating again

[Clyde] yay

[Clyde] y'all still engaged

[Craig] yeah

[Clyde] that's good

 

Tuesday; 6:21 pm

[Tweek] i'm back guys

[Clyde] welcome back bruh

[Kyle] hey tweek

[Kyle] i heard craig called you daddy once

[Tweek] "once"

[Tweek] lmao

[Clyde] :O

[Kyle] WAIT HE DID?

[Tweek] lol

[Tweek] it happened only once

[Tweek] he got embarrassed

[Tweek] and never did it again

[Clyde] LMAO

[Kyle] did you like it?

[Tweek] hell yeah

[Token] y'all are gross

[Clyde] daddy~

[Token] nope

[Clyde] f

[Craig] TWEEK WHY'D YOU TELL THEM

[Tweek] lol he's also very loud in bed

[Craig] pls

[Clyde] i seen craig limping into school when you guys first did it

[Clyde] lmao tweek's dick must be that good

[Craig] oh it is

[Craig] WAIT NO SHUT UP

[Token] jfc

[Kyle] y'all should've seen stan when i told him i wanted to go further with him

[Clyde] what happened

[Kyle] let's just say

[Kyle] i've never seen someone look so hungrily at a dick

[Clyde] OOOOOO

[Tweek] lmao

[Token] interesting

[Kyle] btw kenny's getting a new phone

[Kyle] a shitty one but still

[Token] are he and butters back together

[Kyle] yeah

[Kyle] gregory was right

[Kyle] it was a misunderstanding

[Token] good

 

Wednesday; 11:56 am

[Butters] suck his dick, pretend you swallowed, go in for a kiss then drop his kids in his mouth

[Tweek] WHAT

[Stan] binch wtf

[Butters] oh shoot

[Butters] wrong chat

[Tweek] no let's talk

[Stan] WHO WAS THAT MEANT FOR TF

[Butters] my hoe cousin

[Tweek] LMAO

[Stan] jesus dude

[Craig] i'm concerned

[Craig] where'd you even think of that

[Butters] idk lol

[Tweek] i've never laughed this much in my life

[Craig] that's probably true

[Butters] lmao sorry bout that

 

Wednesday; 7:20 pm

[Tweek] bananas taste weird

[Kyle] RIGHT

[Clyde] nigga we eat booty so who cares

[Craig] ...huh?

[Tweek] i don't eat booty

[Clyde] oh...

[Tweek] YOU'VE BEEN DRINKING OUTTA MY MF CUPS

[Kyle] omfg

[Clyde] lmao bye

[Tweek] get back here bitch

[Craig] ew

 

Thursday; 3:39 am

[Clyde] what if the g in gif is silent

[Stan] hmmmmmm

[Tweek] go the fuck to sleep

[Clyde] says you

[Tweek] binch

[Tweek] but seriously go to sleep

[Clyde] what gif i don't want to

[Tweek] fuck off

[Stan] this bitch empty

[Clyde] YEET

[Stan] *throws myself into a fucking wall*

[Tweek] AGHHGGHHH

 

Thursday; 10:08 am

[Token] is gregory still in this chat??

[Clyde] lemme check

[Clyde] lmao yeah

[Clyde] his name still there

[Jimmy] make him answer

[Gregory] i've been reading what you guys say

[Gregory] you're weird

[Clyde] perhaps we are

[Jimmy] WE SURE ARE

[Token] i'm the civilized one

[Tweek] no you ain't

[Token] how am i not

[Gregory] i seen you punch christophe for calling clyde fat

[Token] first of all, that's my mf baby

[Token] don't call him fat

[Clyde] <3

[Token] second, you punched me back

[Gregory] don't punch christophe or i'll fuck up your face

[Jimmy] lol

[Jimmy] y'all dating?

[Gregory] no

[Gregory] i wouldn't mind it though

[Clyde] i'm setting y'all up

[Gregory] i'm capable of doing it on my own

[Clyde] clearly not

[Gregory] fine do as you must

[Clyde] i will

[Token] jesus christ

 

Thursday; 2:58 pm

[Jimmy] ok y'all

[Jimmy] legit question

[Jimmy] if we were all girls

[Jimmy] who would have the biggest tots

[Stan] tots?

[Stan] tater tots?

[Jimmy] *TITS

[Token] what kind of fucking question

[Jimmy] ANSWER IT BICH

[Craig] mine wouldn't be that big

[Craig] probably a b cup

[Jimmy] same probably

[Clyde] imma guess everybody's cup size lmao

[Token] oh no

[Clyde] token would have a double d most likely

[Clyde] craig and jimmy are right with theirs

[Clyde] i would have between a c and d

[Clyde] tweek would have d

[Tweek] hold on why

[Clyde] have you seen your mom's tatas

[Clyde] it's usually hereditary

[Tweek] uh

[Jimmy] so...

[Jimmy] what's kyle then...

[Stan] ooo

[Clyde] double d

[Stan] :O

[Kyle] wait wtf

[Clyde] LMAO

[Jimmy] stan just got hard

[Stan] omfg

[Clyde] stan has c cup

[Stan] oh

[Tweek] WHY ARE MY TITS SO BIG TF

[Jimmy] LOL

[Craig] i hate tits

[Stan] we know

[Clyde] kenny got tiny titties

[Clyde] an a cup or sports bra

[Kyle] haha

[Clyde] butters got like a c cup

[Butters] what about me??

[Clyde] YOU'RE FINALLY HERE

[Token] we're talking about what our boob size would be if we were girls

[Butters] oh

[Clyde] cartman's tits are huge tho

[Clyde] cuz he's fat

[Kyle] LMFAO

[Butters] true

[Gregory] why you guys talking about your boob size

[Clyde] cuz we can

[Gregory] alright then

[Clyde] you got big titties

[Gregory] good to know

[Clyde] indeed

[Stan] lmao christophe got big titties too

[Clyde] lol

[Gregory] i don't see the point

[Token] you get used to it

[Gregory] mmm

 

Thursday; 12:17 pm

[Kenny] screw choking me, smack me in the head with a microwave

[Clyde] YOU GOT A PHONE YAY

[Kenny] yuuuup

[Kenny] glad my facebook didn't get zucced while i was gone

[Clyde] true true

[Kyle] can we talk about what you said kenny?

[Kenny] mmm don't worry about it

[Kyle] i'm concerned

[Kenny] lol

[Craig] I'M BEING VICTIMIZED IN MY OWN HOME

[Kyle] ???

[Craig] tweek's mad cuz i brought another guinea pig home

[Tweek] WE HAVE ENOUGH

[Craig] how?

[Tweek] WE HAVE 25 NOW

[Craig] I WANT A LOT OF KIDS BABE

[Tweek] ME TOO BUT NOT GUINEA PIGS

[Craig] WE CAN HAVE 25 HUMAN KIDS TOO

[Tweek] FOR REAL???

[Craig] YES

[Tweek] OMG I LOVE YOU

[Craig] I LOVE YOU TOO LET'S FUCK

[Tweek] BET

[Kenny] lmfao

[Kyle] what just happened

[Kenny] true love that's what

[Clyde] take notes fellas

[Clyde] step 1: want 25 kids

[Clyde] step 2: get sum dicc

[Stan] :O

[Stan] kyle

[Kyle] no

[Stan] damn

 

Thursday; 11:41 pm

[Kyle] mcdonalds be mixing their sprite with jumper cables

[Kenny] you're not wrong

[Kenny] shit be tasting like straight up acid

[Stan] deadass

[Token] cringe

[Stan] no u

[Token] y'all are messed up

[Kenny] you know. i'm something of a retard myself

[Kyle] lol

[Stan] OH YES D A D D Y

[Kenny] oof

[Kyle] YEET

[Token] i'm leaving

[Kyle] lmao

 

Thursday; 10:19 pm

[Stan] my main goal

[Stan] is to blow up

[Stan] and then act like i don't know nobody

[Stan] HAHAHAHHAAH

[Craig] i hate you

[Stan] i hate me too

[Kyle] :'(

[Stan] i'm sorry

[Kyle] i love you though

[Stan] i love you too babe

[Craig] weird flex but ok

[Stan] lmao

[Kyle] stan can i come over

[Stan] yeah door's open

[Kyle] ok thanks

 

Friday; 9:01 am

[Kenny] bluetooth is just a boneless aux cord

[Stan] a vape is just a boneless cigarette

[Tweek] winter is just spicy summer

[Clyde] sperm is just a boneless baby

[Jimmy] a bean bag is just a boneless couch

[Token] what is wrong with all of you

[Tweek] we're gay

[Stan] yuuuuuuuuup

 

Friday; 8:21 pm

[Kenny] favorite beverage?

[Tweek] coffee

[Kenny] duh

[Stan] beer

[Kenny] fosho

[Craig] tweek's cum

[Stan] ASFJLJSSHJLSAGHH

[Kenny] wouldn't doubt it

[Tweek] me neither

[Stan] lmao

[Token] pepsi

[Kyle] coke

[Token] ew

[Kyle] ur mom

[Clyde] mcdonalds jumper cables sprite

[Kyle] lmao nope

[Kenny] nah man

[Butters] i like hot chocolate

[Kenny] you make the best hot chocolate

[Craig] i'm thirsty now

[Kenny] tweek

[Tweek] omw craig

[Stan] HAHA

[Craig] sweet

 

Saturday; 8:49 am

[Clyde] boys go to mars to spit fat bars, girls go to venus to sugma penus

[Kenny] lol what

[Stan] okurrr

[Clyde] ok bye

[Kenny] DON'T JUST LEAVE

[Stan] ligma

[Kyle] what's ligma

[Stan] ligma balls

[Kenny] I'M WEAK

[Kyle] don't think i won't

[Stan] :OOO

[Kenny] oof

 

Saturday; 5:21 pm

[Stan] i like big butts and i cannot lie

[Stan] i hate myself and i want to die

[Kenny] same

[Butters] please don't

[Kenny] aww i'm sorry buttercup

[Butters] it's ok

[Butters] <3

[Kenny] <3

[Stan] uwu

[Kyle] stop

[Stan] rawr

[Kyle] AGHGHH

 

Saturday; 9:03 pm

[Clyde] what's LGBT stand for?

[Stan] let's get this bread

[Clyde] thanks

[Craig] dumb

 

Sunday; 6:43 am

[Craig] can't wait till i get married so i can finally have sex

[Jimmy] lol

[Gregory] ok that's kind of funny

[Craig] i'm a funny guy

[Stan] *funny looking

[Craig] bitch

[Clyde] you're not funny craig

[Craig] BITCH

[Kyle] wtf is sex

[Clyde] sum naked bullshit

[Kyle] oh ok

[Tweek] sex is a sin

[Tweek] glad i'm still a virgin

[Kenny] same

[Stan] Y'ALL WILDIN

[Kenny] deadass

[Craig] lol

[Kyle] sex is for pussies

[Kyle] and i'm not straight

[Craig] right

[Tweek] #waitingtillmarriage

[Stan] YAS BITCH

[Kenny] lmao i love you guys

[Craig] no thanks

[Stan] I LOVE YOU TOO YOU LITTLE BETCH

[Kenny] yas queen

[Tweek] lmao

 

Sunday; 3:01 pm

[Clyde] why tf are men gay?

[Clyde] girls have buttholes too

[Kenny] breaking news

[Kenny] gay rate drops to 0%

[Clyde] lol

[Craig] cuz we hate tits and pussy

[Clyde] it's a joke

[Craig] you're a joke

[Clyde] GASP

[Clyde] TOKEN

[Clyde] CRAIG CALLED ME A JOKE

[Token] i'll fuck you up bitch

[Craig] whipped

[Token] yup

[Craig] yeah me too

[Kenny] aren't we all

[Clyde] fosho

[Token] don't ever say fosho again

[Kenny] yeah this is what we finna not do

[Token] stop using finna

[Kenny] nope

[Kenny] still finna use it

[Craig] it's really cringy

[Kenny] you're really cringy

[Craig] maybe

[Craig] but my dick ain't

[Token] wow

[Craig] i gotta admit though

[Craig] tweek's is better

[Token] tmi

[Kenny] of course you'd know that

[Kenny] you take it up the ass

[Craig] not my fault he's good at it

[Kenny] lol

[Clyde] thanks for the information

[Craig] you're welcome bitch

[Clyde] token is pretty good too

[Token] just "pretty good"?

[Clyde] YOU'RE AMAZING

[Token] that's better

[Kenny] lol


End file.
